about my life...simple

i have come a long wayA State of Mind - Voices
to a distant place far far away
from where i used to live
and from what i used to do;

Life is a rosy dream,
happiness and joy aplenty,
everything that i wanted and
everything is as i had hoped for;

Everything is as i had hoped for,
everything is as i had longed for,
everything is except for the turmoil
that plagues me inside every day;

I sleep, i smile, i laugh, i play, i eat and i live
in a constant state of fear,
a fear that i did not ask for,
and one that i did not longed for;

killing me from inside,
silently screaming for it to stop,
i am devoured by my own inner self,
day in and day out;

haunting and taunting me,
time and time again,
they run helter and skelter
in the deep recess of my mind;

it’s just a state of mind,
i tell myself
hoping to erase these thoughts
of fear that hinges on the edge of my happiness;

Trapped inside my own mind,
eclipsed by my fear,
tears weep without a choice
hoping to vanquish (flood) this struggle within;



Read more: http://www.poetryoflife.com/a-state-of-mind/#ixzz1KMeIT5uZ

Wednesday, 27 July 2011

triumph in the sky...

yay!!Alhamdulillah...i grab what i want.i have what i dreamed before.And at the same time, pondering and sighting  any possibilities that it is impossible i can achieve is an absurd  thought that had been stayed in my mind.I have to force myself to throw away anything that i think is hard but the reality it is the simplest and easiest one.At the beginning, i put a limit for my ability,i said to myself that i can manage only this stuff, not this stuff.But then, i saw something uniqueness and nice shining in the thing that i hate to do.I start to instill interest and enthusiast to it.I start it and try to learn again.Until now, i am trying to manage everything with my ability that had given by Allah.My ability is my power.Thanks and i feel so grate to feel this sense of hardness.

Sunday, 17 July 2011

Aku dah tak dapat nak ucap dengan apa apa perkataan.Aku dah besar.aku bukan kanak kanak lagi.Aku dah nak masuk universiti.Aku kena lebih bersikap matang.I cant be childish anymore.Aku dah 19 tahun.Aku tulis semua ni lepas aku dah confirm dapat masuk u.Aku kena ubah sikap aku.Aku ialah Aina Mardia Nasaruddin.Biarpun orang kata hidup hanya sekali.Tetapi, Aku yakin Allah akan bagi peluang kedua.Aku akan buat yang terbaik dalam peluang pertama kerana aku yakin peluang kedua sukar dicari dan diberi begitu sahaja.Apatah lagi aku anak sulung kepada 5 orang adik.Sudah pasti aku kena tunjuk prestasi yang cemerlang...Apapun aku ada Allah.Aku ada tempat untuk mengadu.Syukran